


Osaka

by FishEyenoMiko



Category: Tokyo Ghoul
Genre: Amnesia, Blindness, Cannibalism, Community: cottoncandy_bingo, Community: hc_bingo, Friendship, Gen, Help, Manga Spoilers, Nightmares, Post-Traumatic Stress Disorder - PTSD, Prompt Fic
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-11-06
Updated: 2014-11-06
Packaged: 2018-02-24 07:51:26
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 6,352
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/2573912
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/FishEyenoMiko/pseuds/FishEyenoMiko
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Kaneki and Hide deal with the aftermath of the raid on Anteiku.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Osaka

**Author's Note:**

> Beta: [AvatarMN](http://archiveofourown.org/users/AvatarMN)

Kaneki woke up, slowly opening his eyes. He felt odd, like he'd fallen asleep in a strange place. He blinked, looking around. It was pitch black.

"Kaneki?!" said a familiar voice. 

"Hide...?"

"Yeah, Kaneki! I'm so glad you're okay!"

Hands clasped his. 

"I was so worried!"

"Hide... could you turn on a light?"

"... light...?"

"Yeah," said Kaneki, "it's so dark in here."

There was a pause.

"Hide...?"

"K... Kaneki..." Hide sounded a little scared. "The lights are on, Kaneki..."

"But... I... I can't..." Kaneki reached up to touch his eyes. He wasn't sure what he was expecting; perhaps he'd find they were covered. 

They weren't.

"Kaneki...?"

Kaneki was confused and frightened. Why was this happening? His head was fuzzy, like a headache was coming on, but not quite.

"Hide... I feel..."

"What is it?" Hide sounded a little frightened, himself. "Are you hurt? Where? I-"

"No," said Kaneki. "I just... I'm confused. I can't think very well... and..."

"And what, Kaneki?"

"I... I can’t see."

"Kaneki..." Fingers gently touched Kaneki's face, near his eyes.

"Do they hurt?"

"No... just..." Kaneki reached up, putting his hands in front of his face, willing himself to see them. "Oh God... Hide... I can't see! I-!"

Hands gently took his. "Shh, Kaneki," Hide practically whispered. "It's okay, I'm here, I'll take care of you, I promise."

Somehow, Hide's words weren't very comforting.

"But... I..." Kaneki felt his eyes again. "Hide, I... it's so dark, Hide..."

"Kaneki, it's okay-"

"It's not okay!" Tears stung Kaneki's eyes and flowed down his cheeks. "Oh, God, Hide..."

He felt Hide shifting on the... bed? And he pulled Kaneki close. Kaneki buried his face in Hide's shirt, sobbing.

"I'm here, Kaneki... I'm here..." Hide began rocking Kaneki gently.

 

Hunger.

Blood in the darkness; so deep Kaneki was wading through it. And not just blood, but arms and hearts and entrails, bobbing in the ruddy liquid. 

Food.

The thought surprised Kaneki; that blood and organs and viscera would spark his hunger...

Reaching down, Kaneki picked up an eyeball. As he looked at the dark iris, it changed; suddenly he was holding a black orb, the red iris staring at him accusingly. Ignoring it, he opened his mouth...

 

Kaneki opened his eyes, and saw only darkness. He screamed, reaching out in search of... anything.

"Kaneki!" came a familiar, concerned voice. A second later a hand took his. "Kaneki, it's Hide. I'm here."

Kaneki remembered that he had been through this already. "I fell sleep?"

"Yeah."

"How long?"

"A few hours," Hide answered.

Kaneki lay for a few moments, staring up at nothing.

"It's not going to go away, is it?"

Kaneki felt Hide stroke his hair.

"I don't know, Kaneki..." Hide voice was quiet. "I hope so. But Kaneki, I promise, I'll take care of you. Okay?" Hide squeezed Kaneki's hand.

Kaneki nodded. "Okay."

There was a brief pause, then Kaneki spoke up.

"I don't understand... how did this happen?"

"What's the last thing you remember?"

Kaneki tried to think, but so much of it was vague. "I... can't..."

"Okay," said Hide. "It's okay, Kaneki."

"Hide... I know I just woke up, but I'm still so tired..."

Hide tone was light. "Then get some sleep. I promise I'll be here when you wake up."

 

There was a noise in the dark; a slithering, skittering sound that made Kaneki jerk awake. It was still dark. Kaneki strained his ears, but the sound seemed to have stopped. Had it been a dream? Did Hide hear it? Why did just thinking about the sound make him feel ill?

It was dark. Kaneki realized that it might always be dark for him now...

In the darkness, there was something warm next to him. It smelled good, too. He snuggled into it.

"Kaneki? You awake?"

Kaneki nodded. His mind was still foggy, but overall he felt better.

"Where are we?"

"My apartment," Hide replied.

"Your bed?"

"Yeah."

Kaneki nodded again.

"I wanna sit up."

"Okay."

Kaneki felt Hide move around on the bed, then he gently took Kaneki's arms and helped him up.

Kaneki sat for a few moments, staring at nothing.

"Are you okay?"

"I..." Kaneki thought it over. "No. Not right now."

"Is there anything I can do to help?"

Kaneki shook his head. "I just need to... I dunno."

"Okay."

Kaneki heard a rumbling noise.

"I... I think I'm hungry."

Hide laughed. "Yeah, I think so. I... I should go fix you something, huh?"

Kaneki just nodded.

"Okay."

Kaneki felt the mattress tilt as Hide got up.

"Kaneki, I'm gonna go to the kitchen. But it’s really close; if you need anything, just yell, okay?"

"Okay."

Hide gave his shoulder a little squeeze.

 

Kaneki closed his eyes and listened. With his eyes closed, he felt better about not being able to see. He could hear Hide moving around in the kitchen, opening the fridge, getting out cookware, turning on the stove. He could picture it all in his head. It was comforting.

Soon Kaneki could hear the sizzle of meat, and a rather pleasant smell filled his nose. He breathed deeply, smiling.

More sounds; Hide putting the food on the plate, no doubt. Kaneki's stomach growled again. 

"Okay," Hide said, his voice getting louder as he walked towards the bed. "It's some meat... I hope you like it."

"It smells great."

"That's good," said Hide cheerfully. 

Kaneki heard sounds; the soft clanking of silverware as Hide cut the meat for him.

"Okay, I... I think it might work best if I feed you, okay? We can work on you learning to eat on your own if we have to, but for right now-"

"Yeah, it's fine," Kaneki said tersely. He really wanted to eat.

"Right; sorry." A pause, then Hide spoke up again. "Okay, open your mouth."

Kaneki did so. A second later the meat pressed against his tongue. He shuddered; it tasted as good--no, _better_ \--then it smelled. He bit down, sliding it off the fork and chewing it.

"How it is?"

" _Incredible_!" Kaneki opened his mouth. "More..."

"Okay, let me cut some more."

A moment later, Hide put another piece in Kaneki's mouth. He chewed and swallowed that, as well. "More."

"Yeah," said Hide. "Let me cut a bunch of it, okay?"

Kaneki let out a mewl of protest, but sat patiently, listening to the sounds of cutlery as Hide prepared his food.

"Okay, open."

Kaneki took another bite. "So good... more."

Another bite. "More."

Again. " _More_."

"O-okay, hang on..." Kaneki barely noticed the shakiness in Hide's voice. He didn't even think to question the cause. He just wanted to _eat_.

Kaneki was given another bite of the delicious meat, which he quickly chewed and swallowed.

"More."

Another bite.

"More!"

Another...

"More!"

"Just a sec-"

"I said MORE!"

"I need to cut more to-"

Kaneki didn't care about Hide's explanations; he just wanted _more_. He reached out, part of him hoping to grab the food, most of him not really thinking about what he was actually doing.

The mattress tilted as Hide got off of it.

"Kaneki! Calm the hell down!" 

Kaneki blinked; it took him a second to realise he'd opened his eyes. He still couldn't see, yet he got a very clear image of himself, sitting alone on the bed, his arm awkwardly outstretched. He pulled back.

"I know you're hungry," Hide continued, his voice soft and full of sympathy. "But there's no reason to eat so fast. I'll give you as much as you want, and there's more in the fridge I can make, okay? I won’t let you go hungry."

Kaneki now felt rather embarrassed about his outburst. And, really why had he been in such a hurry? The food was good, but wasn't that all the more reason to eat it slowly, to savor it? Besides, eating slower would fill him up faster.

"I'm sorry, Hide. I don't know what came over me..."

"It's okay, Kaneki." Kaneki felt him sit back down. "Still hungry?"

"Yes, please. I mean..."

Hide laughed. "Open up."

Kaneki took his time with this piece, chewing slowly, sighing happily at the taste.

"More, please."

 

With Hide's help and patience, Kaneki finished the whole piece of meat. He found that, having taken his time, he was full by the time he'd finished.

"Thank you, Hide. It was good." Kaneki smiled. "I didn't know you could cook."

"It's just warming up some meat," said Hide modestly. "It wasn't that hard."

"Still... thanks."

"No problem. I'm gonna go take care of the dishes. It should only take me a moment."

"Okay."

"Do you want some coffee? I can get it started while I do dishes."

"Oh! That sounds good. Thanks."

"Yep. I'll be close; holler if you need anything."

"Okay."

Kaneki sat listening to sound of dishes being done, and of the coffee maker quietly working.

 

"Okay, the coffee's ready," said Hide, his voice getting louder and closer as he spoke. Then the bed sagged as Hide sat next to him. "I think you can drink this on your own... hold out your hands."

Kaneki held his hands out and took the warm cup. He found the handle, holding it carefully.

"There ya go," said Hide. "Think you can handle it?"

Kaneki hesitated.

"Something wrong?"

"I'd hate to spill on your bedding," Kaneki replied.

"Oh, don't worry about it," Hide said lightly. "I need to change the bedding. In fact, I was thinking: After your coffee, we can get you a shower, and I can change the bedding so you can be nice and clean when you sleep tonight."

"Okay," said Kaneki, smiling. He carefully brought the cup to his lips, tipping it back. He sipped.

"Good?" 

Kaneki carefully moved the cup away from his mouth.

"Yeah it's really good. Thanks!"

"You're welcome!"

 

Kaneki finished his coffee. "You mentioned a shower?"

"Uh, yeah..." said Hide.

"Problem?"

"I... I'm gonna have to help you with that."

"Oh! Yeah..." Kaneki scratched his chin awkwardly. "Sorry..."

Hide laughed. "Don't be. It isn't like you wanted this to happen."

"True. In fact, I'm not sure _how_ it happened." Kaneki struggled to remember, again finding his head getting fuzzy and achy.

"Why don't deal with one thing at a time, okay?"

"Okay."

The bed tilted up and Hide stood. There was a short pause.

"Oh!" said Hide, "I'm holding my hands out to help you up... sorry."

"That's all right," said Kaneki. He put his hands out. Hide took hold of them and pulled him up. Kaneki's feet found the floor but as soon as he was standing, he felt light-headed. He teetered, and Hide grabbed him to prevent him from falling.

"Whoah... easy there, big guy..."

"Sorry... I got dizzy."

"That's okay. Feeling better?"

"Yeah."

"Okay," said Hide. "I'm gonna lead you to the shower."

 

It was slow-going; Hide leading Kaneki, who had one arm being held by Hide, and the other reaching out into the darkness.

"Relax, Kaneki, I'm not gonna let you run into anything."

"Sorry," said Kaneki. "It's just... it's a little scary. I'm okay," said Kaneki, smiling. 

Kaneki heard the door to the laundry room open. Hide helped Kaneki navigate around.

"You're gonna need to get undressed," said Hide, a tinge of nervousness in his voice. "Do... do you think you need help with that?"

Kaneki considered this. "I think I can manage, except maybe the fastenings."

"You can use this to lean on," said Hide, leading Kaneki forward and putting his hand on a waist-high table.

Kaneki undressed, handing his clothes to Hide.

"I’ll undress, too," said Hide. "Or my clothes'll get all wet in the shower." There was the sound of the door sliding open, then Hide gently took Kaneki's arm. "There's non-slip stuff on the floor, but we should still go slow."

"Yeah. I've been in a shower before, Hide."

"Oh, yeah... sorry."

"No," said Kaneki, feeling a little guilty. "You're just trying to help. Sorry..."

They stepped into the shower

"There we go," said Hide. "I'm gonna have you sit on the stool."

"Okay," Kaneki replied. Hide led him forward, and Kaneki slowly lowered himself until his butt made contact with the stool. Hide finally let go of his hands.

Kaneki heard Hide's footsteps, then the sound of the taps being turned.

"Hold out your hands," said Hide, "you can check the temperature."

Kaneki nodded, and the spray of water hit his hands; it was nice and warm.

"Yeah, that's good."

"Okay, here goes." With that, Hide held the spray over Kaneki's head. Kaneki squeezed his eyes and mouth shut to keep the water out.

"Sorry," said Hide, moving the spray away, "I shoulda warned you..."

"That's okay," Kaneki said, smiling.

"Hey, Kaneki...?"

"Yeah?"

"Do you need me to help wash, or do you think you can do it? If I give you the stuff?"

"I think I can manage," said Kaneki. "You just need to give me..." he laughed, "the 'stuff', and I think I can do it."

Kaneki reached out and Hide set the soapy cloth on his hand. He proceeded to wash his arms and legs.

"Uh... I need to clean my... uh..." Kaneki gestured vaguely towards his crotch. "It would help if I was standing up."

"Oh! Right..." said Hide. He helped Kaneki to his feet. "Can you stand okay?"

"Yeah, thanks."

"Okay," Hide replied. "I'm gonna... look away, but I'm right here, so holler if you need me."

"Thanks." 

"Okay," said Kaneki after he'd washed. "Could you rinse me off? Or I could, if you'll give me the shower head."

"I got it," said Hide, rinsing Kaneki off. "Want me to wash your back?"

"Yeah, and I still need to do my front," Kaneki said. Putting the showerhead on its hook to free up his hands, Hide helped Kaneki lower himself back on the stool. Hide took the cloth from Kaneki's hands and added more soap to it.

"Do you need to wash?" Kaneki asked

"Nah," said Hide, "I took a shower this morning. All right, I'm gonna wash your back," and he gently did so, then rinsed the soap off. He placed the cloth in Kaneki's hands. "You can do your front."

"Thanks," said Kaneki. He washed his neck and chest, working his way down. As he washed on his abdomen, he ran his hand over his left side, and noticed something odd.

"Hide... what's this?"

There was a pause. When Hide finally spoke, he sounded incredulous. "That's your transplant scar."

"Transplant?" Kaneki shouted. "When did I have a transplant? In fact, what the hell happened that I needed one?!"

"You don't remember any of that?"

"No!" Again Kaneki found his head aching with the effort of trying to remember.

"Okay... it’s okay, Kaneki..."

"No, it's no okay! I-"

"Kaneki, calm down," said Hide softly. "When we finish the shower, I'll tell you about it, okay?"

"I... yeah, okay..." Kaneki felt unmoored. He knew he was having problems with his memory, but to forget something like this... things were more serious then he'd thought.

Hands gently held his. "Hey," said Hide, "it's okay. We'll figure this out, all right? Do you want me to wash your hair for you?"

Kaneki nodded, holding the towel out for Hide to take. He was suddenly feeling very listless.

Hide took the towel, then gently rinsed the soap off of Kaneki.

For a moment Kaneki sat in darkness, listening to the sounds of Hide getting ready to wash his hair. There was the spray of water, and Hide absentmindedly whistling to himself. Between that and the soft pat-pat of his feet on the wet tile, Kaneki could tell when Hide was getting closer, and finally had gotten behind him.

"Okay, ready?"

Kaneki simply nodded. Hide's hands rested on his head, then he began to work his fingers through Kaneki's hair. It felt nice. Kaneki let out a little sigh.

Hide laughed lightly. "Okay, time to rinse. Cover your face."

Kaneki covered his face and Hide rinsed out his hair. When prompted, he got to his feet and Hide rinsed him off, then turned off the shower.

"All right, let's go." Hide took Kaneki's hands, carefully leading him out of the shower.

"Oh, crap," said Hide as they entered the laundry room, "I didn't get us any clothes..."

"I'll wait. I don't mind just standing here." Kaneki felt one towel put in his hands, and a smaller one was draped over his head. 

"So, I'll get our clothes," said Hide. "Unless..."

"Unless what?" Kaneki asked. He was drying his arms and chest, and curiously studying his transplant scar with his fingers.

"We could go to the bedroom and change there."

"Okay, let's do that."

"Okay!"

 

Hide led Kaneki to the bedroom. He had him sit on a chair--Kaneki was dry by now, except for his hair--and got out pajamas for them.

"Hmmm," said Hide, "You're probably gonna need help getting dressed huh?"

"Yeah, sorry..."

"It's okay," Hide replied. His voice was coming from near the floor. "Lift your feet so I can put your underwear on."

Kaneki did so. "Actually, I think once you get them on my legs, and can pull them the rest of the way."

"Okay, good," said Hide, sounding relieved. "Sorry, it's just-"

"No, it’s okay," Kaneki replied. Hide had slid the underwear unto his ankles. He slid them up to his knees, then, standing up, got them the rest of the way on. "Ta-da!"

"Very nice! Now you have to do it again, with the pajama pants.

"Oh, yeah..."

Kaneki got the pants on without trouble. Then Hide helped him with the shirt. It was a button up, so Hide put it on and buttoned it for him.

"Thanks" said Kaneki.

"No problem! I'm going to go put the towels up. Then I need to make the bed."

"Okay. Er... could you help me back into the chair? I'm not sure how far down the seat is..."

"Oh, yeah, of course."

Hide helped Kaneki into the chair.

"There. Comfy?"

"Yes, thanks," Kaneki replied.

"Okay," said Hide. "I'll be quick like a bunny!"

Kaneki chuckled. 

 

Kaneki sat listening to Hide moving around. The young man was whistling again, and Kaneki heard it get softer as he went to the laundry room, than louder again as he came back to the bedroom.

"Hide?"

"Yeah?"

"Tell me about the transplant."

"Oh... right..." 

There was a brief silence; Kaneki realized Hide was making the bed as he spoke.

"There was an accident, and the only way the doctors could save you was a transplant."

"An accident?"

Kaneki got the feeling Hide was being vague on purpose, though he couldn’t imagine why.

"I don't really know what happened... The accident happened near a construction site, and some of your organs got messed up, that's really all I know."

"Oh... How do I not remember this?" Kaneki thought for a moment. "This... isn't related to my memory loss, is it?"

"No," Hide replied.

"So... I had an accident that left me needing a transplant, and I've had another that's left me blind and with amnesia?"

There was a pause.

Finally Hide spoke. "Yeah," he said in an uncharacteristically soft, sad tone.

Kaneki felt like he should say something, but wasn't sure what.

"Sorry."

"Oh, Kaneki," said Hide, "it's okay."

Hide gently squeezed Kaneki's shoulder.

"Okay, I've made the bed."

"What time is it, anyway?" Kaneki asked

"About midnight," Hide replied.

"Oh! Yes, I guess we should go to bed."

"Yeah," said Hide.

Hide led Kaneki over to the bed and helped him get under the covers

"You know," Kaneki mused, "with as much sleeping as I've done today, I'm not sure how well I'll sleep tonight."

Hide chuckled. "Ah well... we'll get you on a regular schedule soon enough."

 

Kaneki sat up, a feeling of dread overwhelming him. He grabbed for his fingers; feeling for them, making sure they were still there. He threw off the covers, reaching for his toes.

"Kaneki?" Hide sounded confused.

"I don't know," Kaneki, answering himself as much as Hide--he had no clue why he felt this compulsion. Nevertheless, he reached down, feeling for his toes, needing to touch each one to be certain they were still there.

"Kaneki!" Hide grabbed his hands mid-count. "Kaneki, it's okay! They're all-"

"NO! No... I have to... Hide, please... I _have_ to..."

Hide let Kaneki's hands go. "All right. I'm sorry."

Reaching down, Kaneki touched each toe, practically counting out loud. He did the same with his fingers. He realized that was even more absurd; he had to have fingers to touch his fingers to count them...

Kaneki counted everything twice--five, ten, fifteen, twenty; by the time he got to forty he felt better. He let his hands drop to his sides. He let out a cry; it was so sudden and loud even he was startled by it. But once started, he couldn't stop it; he began sobbing. As with the counting, and the dread that had awoken him in the first place, Kaneki had no idea why it was happening. He covered his mouth, trying to silence the hiccupping sobs, and trying to will the crying to stop.

"Oh! Kaneki!" Hide pulled Kaneki into a hug. 

Kaneki sobbed onto Hide's shoulder. "I... I'm sorry..."

"No, no... Kaneki, it's okay..." Hide stroked Kaneki's hair. "You've been through so much... it's okay."

 

Kaneki wasn't sure how long he cried, but by the time he was finished he was exhausted. He slumped over.

"You want me to get you a towel to wash your face?"

"Yes, please."

"Okay," said Hide. "I'll be right back."

Kaneki nodded. 

 

Later, feeling better, Kaneki was laying in bed, Hide gently holding his hands.

"Kaneki...you now you can talk to me about anything, right?"

"Yeah." Kaneki knew what Hide was trying to do. But he barely remembered the dream, and he wasn’t sure telling Hide about it would help, anyway.

"Okay," said Hide softly. He gently brushed some hair out of Kaneki's eyes. "Just get some sleep, okay?"

"Hmmm," Kaneki replied. "You, too. You're gonna have your hands full taking care of me."

"I really don't mind."

"Thanks..."

"No problem. Good night."

"Good night, Hide."

 

Kaneki opened his eyes. It was dark, but it only took him a moment to remember why. Even with that, he couldn't help touching his face and eyes, perhaps subconsciously hoping that his eyes were covered. He sighed.

Kaneki could feel Hide's warmth next to him on the bed. He was curious as to what was on the other side of the bed. Realizing that scooting over could end with him landing butt-first on the floor, Kaneki slid his hand along the bed until he could find the edge. Instead, his fingers ran into the wall. Turning towards the well, he ran his fingers up until, as he guessed, he ran into a curtain. Sliding his hand under it, he found the window. The glass was smooth, and there was warmth coming through.

There was movement behind him. "Hey," said Hide.

"Oh!" said Kaneki. "Did I wake you?"

"Nah, I was up. It's morning, ya know."

"No, I didn't know," Kaneki replied. "What time is it?"

"8:25," said Hide, no doubt reading it off his digital watch.

"Hmmm," said Kaneki. "It feels like it's warm out."

More movement, then he felt Hide leaning over him, and the curtain shifting to one side.

"Oh, yeah, it's nice and sunny out," Hide said.

Hide moved off of him. "I think it's time for us to get up," he said in that somewhat strained way people spoke when they were stretching and yawning.

"Okay," said Kaneki, sitting up. With morning usually came breakfast, but Kaneki didn't find himself feeling very hungry.

"Something wrong?"

Kaneki shook his head. There was no reason to worry Hide by mentioning this. He'd get hungry eventually, and when he did, he'd ask Hide for food. 

"Okay." There was another yawn, and Hide got out of bed.

"We should get dressed. Do you think you'll need help?"

"Yeah... sorry."

"It's fine," said Hide cheerfully.

 

After getting dressed, Hide led them into the living room. He helped Kaneki sit on the couch.

"I'm gonna have breakfast. You hungry?"

Kaneki shook his head.

"Okay. Do you mind just sitting here?"

"No, it's fine."

"Okay!" said Hide

Kaneki could hear the sounds of Hide making breakfast. As he did, he made conversation.

"So, do you remember someone named Yomo Renji?"

Kaneki shook his head.

"He's a guy you met... recently. I think I should call him and let him know what's going on."

"Okay." Kaneki considered. "Are there other people I met 'recently'?"

There was an awkward pause.

"Hide...?"

Hide sighed. "Things in Tokyo are... kinda chaotic. Lots of... ghoul attacks and stuff. And with you being injured and all..."

"Hide...? What are you trying to tell me?"

"We're in Osaka," he finally confessed. "And Mr. Yomo is the only one who really knows..."

Kaneki was stunned. Things were so bad in Tokyo that Hide had moved them to another _city_?

"I'm sorry, Kaneki..." 

"No, it's..." Kaneki thought for a moment. For all of Hide's cheerful goofiness, he could be surprisingly perceptive. "It's okay, Hide. If you felt you needed to do that to keep us safe... I trust you."

"Oh, good." 

There was pause.

"Well," said Hide, "After I eat, I'm gonna call Mr. Yomo and let him know you're awake. Uh, I'm gonna go into the other room to call, is that okay?"

"Yeah, it's fine."

 

Kaneki sat quietly. Normally at times like this, he'd be reading a book. He realized that he wasn't going to be able to do that now. He thought about Braille, which would allow him to read even if he never got his sight back. But he'd have to learn it, which meant that until he did--or until his sight came back--he was stuck... 

"Okay, I called Mr. Yomo," said Hide. "He's gonna come over in a few hours. Oh, damn, I agreed without asked you first."

Kaneki smiled. "That's okay."

"Oh, good," Hide replied.

"Hey, I was thinking," Hide continued, "How would you like to take a little walk? It'll get us out of the apartment for a bit! It doesn't have to be far, just around the block."

Kaneki brightened. He didn't relish just sitting around the house all day.

"Oh, that sounds like a great idea!"

"Great," Hode replied. "Uh... wanna go now? There's really no reason to wait."

"Sure."

"Okay. Er, one thing..."

"What's wrong?" Kaneki asked.

"Well," Hide said, "I'm new at the 'guiding a blind dude around' thing, so..."

Kaneki laughed. "That's okay."

"Okay," said Hide. "Sit here while I get my wallet and the keys. Oh and..."

"And...?"

"You... since you can't see," Hide replied, "you kinda... stare-"

"Oh! I'm sorry-"

"No, its okay. But it might bother other people, so when we go out, you should wear dark glasses. I got some for you."

"Okay!"

 

Hide led Kaneki out of the apartment complex and out onto the sidewalk. Hide had a good hold on Kaneki, and was doing a pretty good job of guiding him. 

"So," Hide asked, "have you ever been to Osaka?"

Kaneki shook his head. "No. You?"

"No. It's pretty nice."

"Hmm," Kaneki replied. "The salt air... I didn't realize we were so close to the sea."

"Oh... yeah..."

"Hide...?"

"I can't really tell. I guess your sense of smell is stronger than mine."

"Oh." Kaneki smiled. "It's nice."

Hide suddenly dragged Kaneki in a new direction.

"Ah!"

"Oh, sorry! The sidewalk turns to the right here," Hide explained.

"Oh, okay. You need to tell me."

"Yeah, sorry..."

Kaneki shook his head. "We're both still getting used to this."

Hide laughed. "True."

 

They slowly walked around the block, Hide telling Kaneki when to turn. Finally, they were on the path headed back to the apartment.

"Hey, Kaneki," said Hide, "You want to walk some more, or are you ready to head home?"

"I'd like go home."

"Okay," said Hide, gently steering Kaneki back to their apartment.

 

The doorbell rang.

"I'll get it!" Hide shouted, probably out of force of habit. "Oh, right... heh...."

Kaneki heard the door open.

"Mr. Yomo! Come on in."

"Hello, Mr. Nagachika. I brought some food; I should take it into the kitchen before we socialize."

"Okay."

"I'll show you where things go," said Hide.

Kaneki listened as Yomo and Hide put things away in cabinets and the fridge, Hide occasionally telling Yomo where to put something. 

A few moments later, Kaneki could hear someone coming up to him. Even barefoot, Yomo's footsteps were heavy; Kaneki supposed he was a large man.

Turning towards the sound of the footsteps, Kaneki smiled. "Hello, Mr. Yomo."

"Hello, Kaneki." There was a pause. "You don't remember me, do you?"

"No, sorry..."

"It's all right," came the man's deep voice. "You've been through a lot."

"Yeah, I get that impression," said Kaneki with a chuckle.

"I was thinking," said Mr. Yomo, "I know you like to read, but under the circumstances... I found some audio books you might like."

"Audio books!" Hide said. "That's brilliant!"

"Yeah!" Kaneki replied. "Why didn't I think of that?"

"I wasn't sure what you'd like, but you and Mr. Tsukiyama seem to have similar taste in books, so I got audio versions of some of the books he likes."

"Mr. Tsukiyama?"

"He was... an acquaintance of yours."

"Acquaintance?"

After a pause, Yomo said, "Your relationship with Mr. Tsukiyama was complicated."

"... okay." Kaneki had a feeling that he wasn't going to hear the story behind that statement any time soon.

"I don't know any of these books," Hide commented.

"Read the synopses on the back to Kaneki and let him decide what to listen to."

"Oooh... Oh, yeah, I see," Hide said. "Thank you, Mr. Yomo. It's nice to have your help."

"I'm glad to do it," Yomo replied. "Don't hesitate to call if you need my help again."

"Sure."

"Thank you, Mr. Yomo," said Kaneki. "I appreciate the books."

"I hope you enjoy them, Kaneki."

"Thanks!"

 

"Well, you wanna pick a book?" asked Hide as soon as Yomo had left.

"Sure!"

Hide laughed. "Okay!"

Kaneki could hear the sound of Hide looking through the CD cases the audio books came on.

"Oh, hang on," he said, "this one is by that author you like."

"Takatsuki Sen?!"

"Yeah," said Hide, " _The Hanged Man's McGuffin_..."

"I haven't even heard of that one!"

"You wanna listen to it, then?"

"Yes! Please..."

Hide laughed. "Okay."

 

Being pretty tech-savvy, it wasn't long until Hide had the audio book figured out, and soon Kaneki was sitting on the couch listening to _The Hanged Man's McGuffin_.

 

"Hide...?"

"Yeah, Kaneki?"

"Could you turn this off for me?"

"Sure," said Hide. The CD turned off. "Are you done? Should I get another one?"

"Oh, no, there's plenty left," Kaneki said, "I just... I'm gettin' kinda hungry."

"Oh! Okay, let me go make you something. You okay to wait here while I cook it?"

"Yeah, thanks."

"Okay!"

 

Kaneki sat listening to the sounds of Hide making his dinner. He inhaled deeply as the scent of cooked meat wafted its way towards him.

"Hey, Kaneki," said Hide, from someplace close in front of him, "Do you wanna eat here?"

"Actually, I'd like to eat the table, please."

"Okay," said Hide brightly. 

Kaneki stood up and Hide guided him to the table.

"Do you want me to help you eat?" Even as Hide said it, Kaneki could hear the sound cutlery; no doubt it was Hide cutting some of the food up for him.

"Yes, please." Kaneki considered. "I probably need to learn to eat for myself, but right now..."

"It's okay," said Hide. "I don't mind helping you."

"Thanks."

"Ready?"

"Hmm," said Kaneki, opening his mouth.

Hide laughed, then gave Kaneki a bite.

Kaneki wasn't as ravenous as he'd been the night before. The food was good, but he didn't find himself desperate for more like he'd been then. He figured it was probably because he hadn't eaten for who-knows-how long.

 

Kaneki sat back, "I'm full."

"You sure?" said Hide. "There's a little left."

Kaneki shook his head. "I'm done."

"Wanna go back to the couch and read?"

"Yes, please."

"Okay!"

Hide led Kaneki over to the couch. As he got the CD player set up again, Kaneki said, "I realize I must be kinda boring, just sitting and listening to books..."

"Nah," said Hide. "I've been watching television." He gasped. "Oh, God, Kaneki, I'm sorry..."

Kaneki laughed. "I've never been a big TV watcher anyway."

"True."

"Okay, it's all set up," said Hide, handing Kaneki the earbuds.

"Thanks, Hide." With that, Kaneki resumed listening to Takatsuki Sen's latest book.

 

Slithering... Where had Kaneki heard that before? It was loud and getting louder, and closer and-

"Kaneki?"

He jumped, and he was pretty sure he let out a yell.

"Are you okay?" Hide asked.

"Yeah... yeah, I'm okay."

"You fell asleep while listening to your book," Hide told him.

"Oh... oops."

Hide laughed.

"It's getting pretty late," he told Kaneki. "I think we should get ready for bed."

"Oh, wow, it's that late? Okay."

 

They showered and got ready for bed.

"Okay," said Hide as he lead Kaneki to bed, "do you need anything before we get into bed?"

"No, I'm okay."

"Okay!" said Hide.

Kaneki sighed as he lay down. 

"Afraid of having another nightmare?"

Kaneki nodded. "I... I just hope they'll stop at some point."

"I'm sure they will," said Hide. Kaneki felt him rub his arm. "I know nightmares can be awful..."

Kaneki just nodded in agreement.

Hide gently rested a hand on Kaneki's. "I'm right here, okay?"

"Okay. Thanks, Hide."

 

Hunger, again, and again the lake of blood... Kaneki reached down, picking up the nearest body part: An arm.

He bit into it, tearing at the flesh like a wild animal.

"Yes, Kaneki, that's it... eat."

He looked up and saw Hide standing in front him. The arm he'd bitten into, that he was still holding on to, was Hide's. The blond boy smiled at him. Part of Kaneki knew he should be horrified by this and yet... and yet... besides, he was so hungry.

Tilting his head back, Hide bared his throat for his friend. "Eat."

Opening his slavering mouth, Kaneki leaned forward...

"NO!"

Kaneki opened his eyes. He flailed out blindly. "Hide!?"

"Kaneki!"

Hide sounded shocked. He also sounded as if he were a few feet away

Kaneki sat up, still reaching out, hoping Hide would grab his hand. "Hide! Where are you? What's going-"

Kaneki's hand made contact with... something. It was warm and pulsing. And as he touched it again, Kaneki realized that he could feel it being touched, much like you could feel yourself touching your arm or face.

"What the hell...?" It was almost a whisper as Kaneki ran his hand long the length of... whatever it was, following it back to where it was attached to him at the small of his back.

"What... what is this? What's going on?"

"Kaneki," came Hide's voice, still from a spot a few feet away, "I... I tried to think of ways to tell you..."

"Tell me what?" There was a pause. "Hide!"

Hide took a deep breath. "The... person they transplanted your organs from was a ghoul. And so you're... half-ghoul."

"Half-ghoul..." Kaneki repeated softly. It sounded like a joke. But why would Hide joke about such a thing? Besides, this... _thing_ growing from his back wasn't anything that belonged to a human.

"What does that mean, 'half-ghoul'?"

"You're stronger than a human," Hide explained, "and you heal better--though even ghouls can be permanently injured, obviously..." 

"How... badly was I injured that this happened?"

"You were stabbed though the eyes. And the brain. A human would definitely have been dead."

"I see. I mean, I understand."

"Kaneki... could you please," Hide seemed nervous, almost frightened. "Your kagune is... a little scary."

"'Kagune'?"

"The thing on your back."

"Oh. What do I do? I... don't know how it works." 

"I'm not really sure, myself, actually," Hide admitted.

Kaneki concentrated. He wasn't sure what to do. He knew he wanted it to go away. "Go away," he thought out loud. To his surprise, the warm, pulsing material dissipated. Hide's sigh of relief was enough to tell Kaneki the... what had he called it? "Kangune" was gone.

"I'm sorry I didn't tell you before," said Hide, his voice coming closer. "I just... couldn't quite find a way..."

Kaneki nodded his understanding.

Hide sat down next to Kaneki and rubbed his back. "You have another nightmare?"

"Yeah," Kaneki replied. "It was..."

Suddenly, something occurred to Kaneki; something that made his dream make sense. According to everything he'd heard, ghouls ate...

"Hide, do... do I eat like a ghoul?"

Hide didn't answer right away, which was an answer in and of itself.

"Oh God..." Kaneki thought about the fact that he'd eaten twice since he'd woken up. "Oh, GOD! Hide, did you... what did you feed me?!"

"It's okay, Kaneki, I-"

"Okay? No, it's not okay! You fed me... you fed me... h-hum-human! Oh, God... I think I'm gonna be sick..." 

Kaneki let out a wrenching sob. He began crying, curling into a fetal position on the bed.

"Kaneki..." Hide put a hand on his friend's shoulder. Kaneki jerked away curling up even tighter, still sobbing.

"Kaneki, listen, please..." said Hide, "Mr. Yomo, he goes way out of the city and finds people who've committed suicide, or have died in accidents. We don't kill anyone, okay?"

"Is... is that supposed to... to make it b-better?"

Hide took a deep breath. "You have to eat, Kaneki." There was finality in Hide's voice, as if he intended to force feed Kaneki if he had to.

"How can you do it, Hide? How can you..." Kaneki sobbed.

"You're my friend, Kaneki. I want to help you."

"But... but... I _eat_ people..."

"I know," replied Hide. "I've known for awhile, Kaneki. And I don't care. I'm going to take care of you."


End file.
